wake up sleepy head!

9:41

Whether unarmed or well equipped, march and fight for the cause of God with your possessions and in person. this would be better to you, if only you knew it.

read till 9:45

terasakah anda?

saya.....ya.

**tink..tink..**

terpisat-pisat

doing what?

erk,,sleeping

SLEEPING!, solat?

about to perform

grin smile. guess what?

what?( realising the tone changing)

good news

go on.

my business,doing great!

good for you then (arrgghh..my business haven't settle it yet)

congratulation's ummi

so i guess i already got a job after exams

jahit tepi

flip flop booky book

so thick till sink my biggie head

wheres the fact, numbers and symbols?

playing around the pages

"Ilmu letaknya didada, bukan di rak-rak buku"

Sungguh luas ilmuMU Allah

peeping isn't good

i know

but that's better than before 

i guess

its purple day!

she said

Tuesday is 'princess colour' day

@pink

@purple

heard any of it?

till the time

so long of nothing

will be back after sometimes

in the making process now

heap of papers to be completed

pails or discussion to be seat

lots of Prayers everyday

and I love the way it is

despite the tears that shed

the unstoppable run

the unspeakable pain

Alhamdulillah, i still got another day to amend

and

 how was your day?

how will it be?

:)

new desktop wallpaper!

after sometime pakai the same wallpaper, i change it.something simple but nice.

 

deck yg kat bawah tu pakai RoketDock. so takdelah messy sangat desktop. fi u know how to customize it, u can even make it lebih kurang mcm apple or watermellon pown bole~

 

desktop pakai Rainmeter. gi search kat google. macam2 bentuk boleh alter. ikut creativity pemilik. however, since im not that creative, so mine is very simple and the lowest level i could say because all stuffs that i used are very basic. 

 

recognise that small box on the upper right?

thats actually my countdown. IB exam. about 47 days 16 hours to go. im using PhanTim3.

 

i search for this countdown during my chemistry class. not during the lesson. its like a revision time and completing the note. at that time i had completed my notes (but not the revision ). so merewang kejap cari bende bukan2. tidaklah  bukan2 sangat pown. countdown nak ingatkan diri yang rajin sangat on laptop. then out of blue, sir datang dari belakng. "dah nak IB exam pown bukak Facebook lagi". and i was like zuuup. cuak and terkezut actually. i didnt open facebook and i dont have it at that time. takpelah, peringatan....

there is actually another date that is very important but to be exact i dont know the date yet. no one knows.could be the next second. what date u think?

thats all i think. i know to u guys out there yang sofware craze or what so ever. this things is just like a spoon in a teacup matter. boleh buat lagi dahsyat lagi. ni yang paling basic untuk golongan yang buta IT macam saya. but i really enjoy customizing things. 

when i was small, i used to have a dream of becoming an interior designer. i like colours so much. but ummi didnt really agreed on it. so here i am taking 'saya-lebah'. but dont get rid of ur dream. i keep it as a hobby. i like to watch Casa Impian (dulu-dulu) and arranging the furnitures in The Sims. tu je yang larat.

i could not shout like you, but i can write

i've never been given the chance to hate him but that is what i am doing since i was born till now.
i didnt even found any reason to like him. even if there are,sometimes. but it would vanish at least 2 days later. and im gonna hate him like mad then.
sometimes, i'll question, why did when i like someone but i cant show it.because i wouldn't be allowed to do so. but when i hate this person, all the things that i can do is to keep it between myself, some murmured or the worst...i'll cry.
seriously, i found no way to like him. i didnt find any single things in him that i can be proud of...

Dear Allah,
please pity her. i dont know in what way he need to be teach. but i really think this is just not right for her. you see how she suffer. how she keep it secret by throwing glasses. then it start again. she did to much for many people and he did nothing. i know that i shouldnt pray bad things for other people. even to write this. but i cant think of anything. please help her...i know im not the right person to make this prayer but please. i cant stand anymore seeing her in that way. give her happiness. give her everything.

i hate him. trully, i hate it
im waiting the day that i will regret this writing. but i cant think of any second.

newborn Delisya Humairah

tadaaa...

we call her humairah. seriously, that 'mother sense' calling like mad. nak main2 bolehlah. cube jaga 24/7? mampu?....belum kott

aiii baby, solehah insyaAllah. (is that my hand?)

about to cry...she needs her mummy.

semoga membesar menjadi insan solehah. peneraju kegemilangan ummah. atleast menjadi pembantu yang setia. kan3?.

i dont know what feelings should i put in for you. hidup x susah tapi x jugak senang. kalau tanye pendapat saya sebagai insan yang hampir 20 tahun hidup. mesti rasa lebih baik untuk berada di sisiNya. tapi anda dah pun selalamt lahir. kalau dipanjangkan umur mungkin 60 atau 100 tahun lagi. Allah je yang tahu.
hidup tanpa kepayahan, takkan buat kita kenal Allah dengan lebih baik. saya pun x ingat all the events inside alam rahim. but through stories, kita ada several conversation with Allah. saya doakan anda sentiasa berpegang pada janji. kita ada tugas yang belum selesai. Sungguh, hidup bukan senang. tapi bukan juga susah bila anda kenal, siapa yang setiap saat bersamamu..

trully i envied you. tanpa sebarang dosa....

his then mine

i was jumping here and there. trying to pull all the attention that i had to focus on the laptop screen. I've been killing all the time i had because of the hatred towards chemistry. even though i know it wouldn't benefit me at the end. OK now, i can say who cares! (deep down in my heart i know i'm gonna cry every night)

so then i don't know what drag me to aiman azlan's blog. i seldomly watch or read his products. maybe because he stressed lot bout love which im very little interest in reading such things. even the 'aku terima nikahnya' series (ummi and lam have been promoting it to me several time but never succeed in making me reading it. only that ''rindu bau pohon tin''. very interesting and u guys should read it. serius.

theres once in aiman azlan's blog bout An unexpected gift. ( i love his english btw). and if i could quoted here from his lecturer i guess

I've met students who could memorize all the words on a page but don't have a clue what those words mean. It's like memorizing a poem without understanding what the poet is trying to say. When you study, use the approach of wanting to understand the materials. That is the only study tip I can give you. (Prof. Steven Short)

 its like a storm which suddenly bang my head. i' ve been doing this through my study years. memorizing facts for the sake of exams. maybe thats why at one point i started to hate certain subject. treating them like "in-my-dream husband"( do refer im pregnant ). so, azam lah sikit. from now on lets start putting many love into the knowledge that we gained. we are the one who have the responsibility in understanding the subject. u dont expect the makcik nasik lemak to read all those energetic or what so ever entalphy. they gonna " huh? ikan bilis baru ke tu?" just kidding. hey!, dont look down you know on such people. siti nurhaliza was brought up through such timeline. korang mampu nak bukak business mcm die. at least she got dato' K. u? (referring to me, no hard feelings...)

thas all. :) love as always

im pregnant!

eyh, jangan salah sangka. its only a dream

last night dream

having my own kids. 

the eldest name afiqah 

the second named balqis 

and another one still in tummy. gosh!

i remember the akad and the husband itself.
but let keep it as a secret first.
 after having 2 + 1 child, than so called husband realize that he is not ready yet.
 idk whether he left me or i left him

i need to raise my child alone
the saddest part is when i need to give my afiqah and balqis to other parent to take care of them. sooo sedey,,,

and of courselah yang tgh dalam perut cannot give to anyone.

jalan cerita of course x sedetail ini. but i put the storyline so that could be understood. i told this story to ummi and she laughed. (is that funny?? it should be sad...)

i think ni mesti pengaruh mana2 drama before that. and i slept unintentionally (meaning without proper doa and all the procedures before going to bed). so maybe. i dont really believes in tafsiran mimpi. and i didnt hope that my husband gonna treat me that way.

buku: Pahala hidup 7K tahun

(about this book)

i bought this book in an Islamic book fair at putrajaya. i think somewhere near PICC. this book was recommended by ummi (she bought one too). so far, belum pun baca thorougly. flip here and there.

ada siapayang dh baca habis?

tak kesah lah kan habis/ tak habis baca. what i know seperti yang saya cakap. Islam itu tersembunyi di balik-balik amal bukan teori atau buku semata-mata.

“Sesungguhnya orang-orang yang beriman itu hanyalah mereka yang apabila disebut nama Allah, gementarlah hati mereka; dan apabila dibacakan kepada mereka ayat-ayat-Nya, bertambahlan iman mereka(kerananya). Kepada Tuhanlah mereka bertawakkal. 

(Surah Al-anfal:2)

Sahabat : kitakah?

"Sebaik-baik orang di antara kamu adalah yang apabila melihatnya membuatmu teringat kepada Allah, perkataannya menambah kebaikanmu, dan amal perbuatannya memotivasikanmu untuk meraih kebahagiaan akhirat." 

[Shahih HR al-Hakim] 

Yallah

its a very interesting talk show i could say. modern and contemporary issues are being raised by the panelist. it just that since it is being discussed in fully arabic, thus i really depend on the translation. and it is not fully translated. maybe someone could improved on that

one of the question was, is that a must for a muslim to do dakwah with the non-muslim or maybe we could only focus on the one with the same akidah as us, the muslims. and the ustaz said, yes indeed it a must.even without enough knowledge

 apa maksud cukup disini?. ilmu dan dakwah dua benda yang berbeza. mungkin kita mampu tahu, tapi untuk sampai tahap 'faqih' segelintir cuma.

(al-Fussilat:33)

siapakah yang lebih baik perkataanya daripada orang yang menyeru kepada Allah, mengerjakan amal yang salleh, dan berkata:"sesungguhnya aku termasuk orang-orang yang meyerah diri"

see...amal itu pun part of dakwah. tak perlu mengeluarkan kata2 pown. by doing good deeds. kurangkan bercakap dan banyakkan amal. mungkin pada awalnya kita akan rasa mcm kosong sbb buat membuta tuli. but berdoalah pada Allah mintak petunjuk supaya apa yang kita buat diberi pengertian. siapa lagi yang mahu meminta dari Allah all those stuff if not the muslims. disamping mengejar Redha Allah, kita jugak dapat buktikan pada mata dunia yang ISLAM adalah the best solution in any state of life.

saya tak nafikan bukan senang nak berperang dengan nafsu sendiri. nak buat apa yang kita hendak. mungkin tak dapat nak ber huha huha dengan kawan2 sebaya. tapi siapa lagi kalau bukan kita umat islam akhir zaman. kita ada tanggungjawab besar merialitikan islam dimuka bumi. kerana hakikat Islam itu tersembunyi dibalik2 amal. bukan dibalik2 buku bertimbun2. sebabtu kalau kita tengok, masyaikh2 dan imam2 dahulu atau pengarang2 kitab2 masyur, akhlaknya sangat tip top. mereka menulis dengan amal. maka ramai mudah mengikuti

kenapa Rasululah tidak mengarang buku?. saya pun bukanllah pengkaji sirah. tapi ikut apa yang saya belajar, rasulullah dahulukan menulis manusia. menulis para sahabat yang masyaAllah kekalnya sehingga berempayar2 berikutnya malah hingga kini.

marilah bina personaliti yang unggul. sekiranya belum mampu untuk masyarakat. cukuplah sekadar keluarga dan sahabat terdekat dahulu. Rasulullah insan paling hebat pun bermula dengan perkara yang sama.binalah keluarga.

 buat para lelaki, saya percaya dunia mampu menjadi lebih aman apabila kalian benar2 menghayati cara hidup Islam. kaum wanita InsyaAllah, mereka lebih mudah dilentur mengikut aspirasi and visi kalian

Dr. Harlina once said to us dengan bersaksikan dewan KMB :),

"wanita yang hendak menjadi solehah, carilah yang soleh

tetapi lelaki yang hendakkan yang solehah, awak dulu jadi soleh"

saya mohon dijauhkan dari segala macam perasaan hati yang bukan-bukan. dan semoga ini berguna buat saya, saya, saya dan anda

officially its ended

my recent obsession

hobby baru

takdelah baru sangat

quit a while staterted since 'my ipod' era

org kata x bagus sbb susah nak pcaya

i cant comment much sbb baru pernah sekali and bakal kedua kalinya

so far ok lah

i hate going out to the shops

and dengar the seller membebel and ikut kita kemana2

saya suka gadget baru

but sangat cepat bosan

kalau boleh mmg nak try all the gadget

especially handphone

software pun boleh tahan lah

masalahnye 

jarang bertemu dengan mereka yang se'obsession' denga saya

gadget antara tajuk yang menarik untuk diperkatakan

but kaun hawa ni mcm kurang sikit. 

(^_^)

tapi, mcm tak bagus je hobby ni. mungkin bukan sekarang when you dont hold the money. adik2 berderet2 lagi. and even bile dah besar, saya ada manusia lain untuk saya kedepankan kepentingan mereka. 

Alhamdullilah, sekadar yang ada ni dah jauh dari mencukupi.

nantilah,,,

now i remember

......

......

......

sometimes its there

and you tried to swept it all 

no matter how hard you tried

it just there

and it cant leave you

until you denied it

but how could i

i've tried

it just that

 my reasons for myself

it just fragile

now i remember.

>>may it come to a stop at the end of this season<<

Fall with me

~fall with me~

Subhanallah. it really an experience. after a hectic week, kak ja bawak kami adik beradik jalan2. sangat seronok! sanggup balik subuh2 dari rumah sebab nak ikut sama.

i did wish to climb a hill/bukit/gunung with a white gown (pg tengok my wish list.ke dh delete?). but i guess i got a better experience. panjat bukit bawak baby 4 bulan seberat 8 kg (menurut ummi die) and that cute umar yusuf. owh not to forget sulha and insyirah. semua merasa aku kelek atas bukit. aku rasa kalau buat ni setiap hari, tak yah susah2 minum what that so called susu protein. muscle tangan dengan sendirinya akan naik. adehhhh

 macam mukhayyam tanpa dirancang. kerjasama panjat tangga ala2 batu cave gitu. bile tak larat pas2 kanak2 riang ni pada akhawat yang lain. theres also some ikhwah yang offer nak angkat umar. then yang paling best masa nak turun bukit. lalu bawah pokok. so kami berkerjasama pas2 baby supaya si pembawa boleh lalu bawah sekecil2 hingga ke curam2 laluan. sungguh indah sebuah ukhuwaah

tazkirah kak anisah was about ukhuwah. rukun ukhuwah, perkara yang perlu kita buat untuk mengekalkan sebuah ukhuwah.

penat tu tak payah cakap lah kan. sepanjang hari recharge energy. tau2 dh gelap dh kat luar. tapi with no pain no gain. banyak sangat usrah indirectly kami buat. especially masa dalam kereta. get the first hand experience to interview a medical officer. her expectation on a fresh houseman.what we need to do as a houseman and a medical student. (banyak je jargon yang x berape nak paham. tapi layan jelah...). teringat first time kenal kak ja masa nak invite her to forum "Bila Baju Melayu bertemu Baju Kurung". formal gile aku time tu. segala protokol keluar. i couldt imagine how Allah unite us then.


sungguh saya mengkagumi  seorang insan bernama kak ja. most of my kakak usrah berjaya buat saya impress dengan mereka. manusia2 ini sangat bijak menggunakan kesempatan dan resource kecil pemberian Allah. insyaAllah, nanti kami2 pulak bawak adik- adik jalan2.heee~

Firman Allah:

“walaupun kamu membelanjakan semua (kekayaan) yang berada di bumi, niscaya kamu tidak dapat mempersatukan hati mereka, akan tetapi Allah Telah mempersatukan hati mereka”. 
(Al-Anfal: 63)

to all my friends, i would like you guys to know that

saya sayangggg kalian

:)

p/s: photos yet to come. semenjak berdiam diri dari fb. susah nak dapat supply gambar2. takpe2 nanti kita cari jalan lain.