Monday 31 December 2012

kenapa saya disini?

salam,
just got back from jalanjalan.
horsie


 JUMS was my first destination. edin. i dont know what happened to me. but that definitely will be a lesson to me. when you go to some places or approaching people, go all heartedly. if not you'll get nothing. just because im reluctant so i ended up a bit late to catch up all the issues. but Subhanallah...all of the rest was brilliant.

bila mana kita decide untuk ikut sesuatu atau menjadi ahli kepada sesuatu, fahami gerak kerja mereka dan tetapkan apa yang kita mahu capai. ramai btanye kenapa saya disini sedangkan the rest semua di tempat lain?

pertama,
saya pun tak sedar. saya kesini disebabkan besarnye sifat malas dan pentingkan diri sendiri saya. saya tidak mencari. jadi saya hanya bertemu dengan yang ini. kebetulan kumpulan yang lagi satu saya tak berapa aktif, makanya saya disini. but i grew the understanding along the way.

kedua,
saya sedar bilangan kami sedikit, saya sedar besarnye potensi saya untuk dijemput bekerja sebab mereka tidak ramai. Subhanallah, ini memang berlaku. bayangkan dalam kapasiti kami yang hanya kurang 5 orang sewaktu kolej benar2 memaksa saya untuk bekerja. ikhlasnya saya bukan sebaik pakaian saya. tapi saya akan cari dimana ada peluang itu. saya belajar banyak sangat tentang adab berjemaah. cara berjemaah. semuda usia itu saya ditugaskan untuk sesuatu yang besar. saya diajak dalam perbincangan yang besar-besar. saya berpeluang bertemu dengan insan-insan hebat. saya yakin, saya hanya dipilih ketika itu kerana bilangan kami kecil. sekiranya tidak, dengan segala kemalasan dan sifat  saya, percayalah saya memang tidak layak..Allahuakbar!

ketiga,
ukhuwah. saya sayang ahli keluarga baru saya. keluarga kami kecil. itu yang membuatkan saya hampir mengenali semua orang. dari ketua wanita hinggalah ke sekecil2 nazim. heee.. setakat ini saya selesa berukhwah bersama mereka.

keempat,
saya sangat menghormati kakak usrah saya. kata-katanya mudah masuk dengan saya. saya punye ego sangaaat tinggi. sukar untuk dengar kepada sebarang orang. hairan, kata-katanya begitu senang mendidik. mungkin kerana saya meletakkan hormat yang tinggi padanya. dan dia selayaknya dihormati dan dikagumi amalnya. kata-kataya bukan sekadar angin dan bayang2. saya suka bila dia kurang bercakap mengenai hal hati dan perasaan. kata-katanya terselit banyak gerak kerja dan amal. bukan sekadar 'rasa'.saya nak jadi lebih hebat dari dia!

kelima,
stratergi. saya berkenan dengan stratergi kumpulan saya. kami menyedari masalah umat dan cuba keluar dengan solusi. solusi kami dinamik. menyedari besarnya kepentingan melayu pada kadar ini, maka kami keluar dengan sebuah slogan.saya akui terlalu awal untuk saya bercakap soal ini kerana ceteknya ilmu, namun saya sedang membina kefahaman mengenainya. sehingga kini saya tidak nampak celanya. sekurang-kurangnya pemikiran mereka spesifik.

saya tidak merendahkan kumpulan lain. saya pernah berada dalam beberapa kumpulan berbeza. selagi mana kita sunni, saya rasakan kesemuanya berfungsi, tiada celanya untuk terus bekerja. dengan kapasiti kita yang sedikit, mana mungkin kita rangkul semua manusia. cerilah erti dalam bekerja. bukan sekadar perjumpaan setiap minggu.

cuma saya masih hairan mengapa perlu kita mencela satu sama lain. apa silapnya?

tak mampu selamanya bersendirian. 




Wednesday 19 December 2012

if you, ill say this


i like the way u address me
i thought that im flying when u call me
i can stop smiling while talking to you. you asked. i just said becoz im like this
im not. im soo happy to hear your voice, talking to me
u didnt know those think kan?

i just want  to be by your side
i just want to support you when you have no hope
i want to make you happy when the world dissapoint you
i just want to keep quiet, and you do all the talking
i just want someone to hear me

sometimes i question myself,  i am normal aren't i?
being here far from your family
you just need someone to be there for you. some human.
and i thank Allah so much that He game me a she
no a He
because i cant handle it
i dont think i can handle it.

let the 'he' be my husband terus.
 i dont want anything in the middle





exam habis

what the purpose of writing if ur making it private in the first place....

Ireland yet to snow


Assalamualaikum sayangs sekalian,
i just ended my exam week. almost a week but the tiresome was urghhhh...just cant describe it but i know life was worth it that time as to compare to my state right now. i dont know what to do. i guess im just born to be a doctor! those crazy time. i did asked kak yati and suha in the first week that im free for anything after the exam week. call me for any help. no, nothing was on. so i wasted one day of my life. if i was to die at the age of 70 know that i actually only alive for 69 days. Allah, actually less than that.

ok so tomorrow will be better,
here how i thought it will be. am going to meet kak yati in the morning. she offer the title bibik. bibik pown bibik lah meringankan keje org kan bagus. i wanna cook!!!. so then ill go to city buy stuufff for cooking and baking. yeay!. then balik rumah and start all those things. how nice if farah can ajak me to her house to bake!!!. but so malu nak pg her house. i always make her house as mine. so now ill keep my very best to visit them very least. supaya btambah kasih sayang apabila bertemu sekali sekala. :P

i also dont know how am so attach to farah few backdays. i can say that she soo funny and to this day am so comfortable with her. i like somebody else before. keep on kejar2 that person by the help of farah. but dont realize that we grew this relationship along the way and i almost forgot who my actual subject was. but i still love all of them. ngeh ngeh ngeh....
shes now my first ever  (senior) best friend. i like her :)

naaahhh pleaseeee dont hope that ill spitt out all those lovely words even though i have sooo mannyyy and i want to express it. but i just cant.
did u ever heard i say;
 "i love you",
"ana sayang giler kat anti"
"i just wanna meet you and that's all i want with you"
" its enough that u let me to love you. i dont hope you to love me back"

never

im sooo good in writing but not in expressing face to face. So to all my sayangs, i might sound very cold heart sometimes but i just cant help my self from not-expressing those words.

when i love someone, i dont forget their names. so, whenever i call u by the name, thats mean i love you.

 i'll keep on texting and conteng  someones wall with just a 'smiley'...thats means " i missed you so much".
 a 'like' and a reply means so much to me.

Sunday 16 December 2012

how talk to him

him here is referring to any tom dick and herry guys that is ur mahram. anyone,,could be your classmates, neighbor, cousins etc..etc..etc..

simple guideline

always always always think whenever ur talking to him pretend as if there's ur father or maybe your husband (hew..hew.. this is interesting) around. so what will you do if theres those person around? most probably we'll be really watch every single words and act while talking.

this is not a fatwa.

just ways in preserving the hayah.

EXAM week

those week
really shows who are the true believers or people embracing Islam just for the sake of their own life.

how funny is it when exam time, easily u woke everyone to perform their tahajjud and dhuha but refrain solat jemaah when no exam around. not to say the tahajjud. almost vanish from the dictionary.

how funny when you keep on reminding people for sunnah fasting during exams but the only stomach you care about was yours when there's no exams.

how funny when you spend the 10 minutes for the last sujud and almost 20 minutes just to recite the supplication after prayer. its the most mustajab time! u said. but hardly wait even for the zikr when theres no exam around. the korean half naked women are more important huh?

how funny when u limit 15 minutes of your time for eating when there's exam around. time is precious, my anatomy books deserve all the minutes!. but willingly to spend 10 hours+ extra 5 hours just for a nice sleep when there's no exams.

sigh =_='

just stop pretending, can't you?. and it shows how pathetic u are. u thought Allah dosent know it? but at least, theres sometimes in u life that u think Allah and this deen is important. and you know that those celebrities, whom your making as the idols are nothing but a _____.

 if you can be serious with life when there's exam around. why not after the exam? do you think you already pass it and greatly enter jannah? Owh my Allah.

Artinya :
Dari Abu Hurairah radhiyallahu ‘anhu, ia berkata : NabiShalallahu ‘alaihi wa sallam bersabda : "Allah Ta'ala berfirman :"Aku menurut sangkaan hambaKu kepadaKu, dan Aku bersamanya apabila ia ingat kepadaKu. Jika ia ingat kepadaKu dalam dirinya maka Aku mengingatnya dalam diriKu. Jika ia ingat kepadaKu dalam kelompok orang-orang yang lebih baik dari kelompok mereka. Jika ia mendekat kepadaKu sejengkal maka Aku mendekat kepadanya sehasta. jika ia mendekat kepadaKu sehasta maka Aku mendekat kepadanya sedepa. Jika ia datang kepadaKu dengan berjalan maka Aku datang kepadanya dengan berlari-lari kecil"(Hadits ditakhrij oleh Bukhari).


smarttt!!

ok masuk list baju raya

Friday 14 December 2012

Assalamualaikum,
not feeling like wanna study biochemistry now. thought of sleeping early and wake up early aso. bu turn out my 'bibik' gene woke up like crazy just now. it makes me cean and mop the entire house. woosh. this gene x active selalu tapi kalau time tgh active, insyaAllah keje ape pun mampu buat!. hehehe

handsome kan die :)

random : may kak siti gets better soon.

Wednesday 12 December 2012

"i always think that I've crossed that line. but in reality i didnt"


guys,
to whom u are giving the pen, drawing ur line? who told you that that's the line from where ur standing. you are comparing yourself and you started to think that you never crossed that line.depressed, sad, lost hope and? thats the end

dear,
live ur life for the sake of Allah. trust me, u'll see no line. he accept every step of you.of course you still need to walk. think! in everything, stagnation shows how bad one situation is. progression is glory. no matter how small it is. it count.
that's the best of falling in love with the most merciful and loving. he din't care.

dearest,
walk even it cause just a micro meter step ahead. cause in HIS eyes it matter.
it may be a big determinant for our place in the hereafter.

Allah, i just wanna met you.

Monday 3 December 2012